It does seem reasonable to ask your father to not include the girlfriend for this year's special holidays and anniversaries but that you will be more ready next year.
To me, the main point is to maintain your relationship with your father and not let this sad temporary time create a more permanent relationship problem.
But his interest in dating now that he is widowed does not mean he loved your mother less, or is dishonoring her memory. It often means that the marriage was good and he misses having a wife to be a part of his life.
In spite of that, generally speaking, this is not a good time to start another relationship.
While you may be shocked that this has happened-no one is more shocked than your adult children.
So thrilled with this new relationship, you cannot imagine that everyone will not feel the same excitement.
Or, in his rush to find companionship, he might use less-than-stellar judgment about whom to pair up with." He may simply want a romantic person in his life and as such, you may want to listen to your husband and brother.
Statistically, many studies have found that married males do live longer than their unmarried cohorts.Right now I don't even think I can go and face my father and "his woman." I don't want to disappoint my family but I believe to go and for him to bring her completely dishonors and disrespects my mother.-- DEVASTATED DEAR DEVASTATED: First of all, let me offer my condolences on the death of your mother -- words fail.Now you find yourself sleepless, flushed, and unable to think of anything else.Once it may have seemed unimaginable- but here you are middle-aged and head over heels in love like a teenager.Our parents were wonderful parents and had a great marriage.